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    不知道

    雖然不是最近才有, 但感覺越來越強烈

    最近把經濟殺手的告白看完了, 這真是相當程度的震憾去米國的夢
    上次和董'r 吃飯時, 他也問我到底想去米國做什麼, 我也答不出來
    加上進來這家公司後, 我也開始在想我到底要不要去
    不知道自己要不要放棄

    和人們相處, 常常會開始覺得悶了
    有很多話題是我沒興趣的, 但又非得要表現出某種程度的參與感
    有很多時候要假裝很開心, 很關心, 但其實我在想這個人真的有認真理我嗎 ?
    雖然已經練會了裝熟的功夫, 但心理面討厭的感覺確壓不下來
    不知道自已的臨界點

    常常找不到人出去玩, 可是我又常把某些邀約給推掉
    總覺得找不到可以和我tone match 的人
    不知道自己到底要幹嘛

    最近實在很混, 沒有一個目標.........................明明有好多事要做才對

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    唉~人老了吧!我也有這種感覺哩!有時候要裝得好像很熱絡,明明心裡又覺得這根本不是自己的本意。你比我厲害多了啦~我還是一遇到不對盤的人,就整個臉臭,還得多跟你學習學習哩!

    人生總有高低起伏,心情也有。美國...算是一個夢想吧?換個角度想,如果你沒有去,十年後你會不會後悔哩?但國外生活的確不如預期的容易,就算有親人在身邊,還是常會覺得無助。問我曾經後悔過嗎?是的,某種程度上,我真的後悔過。但如果我沒有來,我想我一定會更後悔,就是這樣。人生的路,靠你自己決定,不管你來或不來,不要做會讓自己後悔的決定哩!

    另外...不要低潮太久,你時間挺寶貴的,不是嗎?^^
    Sept. 10

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